has a wide variety of characters and goons, Conker being the obvious
protagonist of the series. There are however, a few characters that in
no way existed in the original series, and they, along with the
official characters will be described here. Note that this character
biography list is incomplete, and any inaccurates or inconsistencies
will be corrected in future updates to the site.
Conker the Squirrel
The protagonist of Bad Fur Day. Conker usually gets into strange adventures because of his frequent drinking. After having a bad Hungover, Conker sets out on a journey with only one thing on his mind; making his way back home to bed. Along the way as he helps out people in need in one way or another he finds wads of cash called Fajo, and kind of becomes sidetracked from his goal. Aftar a number of bizarre events and strange encounters, having helped out during a war between the SHC squirrels and the Tediz, an army of evil nazi teddy bears created by Ze Professor von Kriplespac, and after having battled an alien named Heinrich in a space vault, he eventually arrives in the Throne room. While in there he kills the alien with the katana. At the same moment the characters he met earlier enters the room, praising him for defeating the evil "Panther-Type King", while in actuality he killed the alien. Despite being given the opportunity to become king, Conker doesn't want to, as he realizes he forgot to ask the programmers to bring Berri back to life. The guards take him to the throne anyway, and is soon crowned king over the entire Fairy Panther Kingdom. After telling the story of how he came to be king he tells the audience of appreciating what one already has instead of always wanting more.
After the credits Conker is seen at the pub he first appeared at in the beginning of the game, and asks the bartender, who apparantly is working overnight, for a glass of single malt scotch, spey-sided, and with no ice. After he gets his drink, the bartender notices that Conker seems a bit down in his mood and asks him about the matter. Conker tells him that if he told him his story, he wouldn't really believe in it, and doesn't wanna talk about it. Later after his drink Conker stumbles into the dark once again in his return to home, but stops yet again, this time looking at the way he last took(which leads to the Panther Kingdom), and instead goes the opposite way. What happened to him after that remains unknown, but he apparantly came to yet another if not similar kingdom, or he may of have ended up at home.
Conker's girlfriend and one of his only true loves, this woman sure has all of what many would call a definitive stereotypical type, also posing an rather naive but no-nonsense attitude to herself. She gets abducted by a Rock Man in Bad Fur Day, merely because Don Weaso, head of the Weasel Mafia, wanted to have an exotic dancer on the rock men's rock club Rock-Solid. She's rescued by Conker, but oddly enough doesn't recognize him. Though it's very likely because of the hat Conker was wearing, thus being mistaken for one of the Uga Buga guys. She's killed in the end by Don Weaso, which makes Conker angry as Berri was his only love. In Conker's pocket Tales she threw a surprise party for Conker on his birthday. What was unknown however was that Conker's "nemesis", the Evil Acorn, was waiting inside the cake, only showing up to ruin Conker's party and steal his presents and Berri.
VonKripelspac is a weasel scientist who worked for his former boss, the Panther King and is the main antagonist in Conker's bad Fur Day. He's bound to a wooden hoverchair(a high tech supplement for a wheelchair), has no legs but crudely bandaged stumps, and has a robotic eye and arm. He once was the Weasel king, but were overthrown by the Panther King who recently has betrayed the Kulas of Conk. After the war with the SHC, he worked for the king, who threatened him with the "duct tape", as both an inventor and general problem solver. Due to his present position as a mere servant, he has grown a hatred for the king and often cursed him off behind his back, plotting to overthrow the king with his soon-to-be-resurrected tediz army which in the end was thwarted by Conker. He slipped an alien egg in the kings milk glass which the Panther King unknowingly swallowed along with his so-much-wanted milk. When the time came it was born and killed the king as it jumped out of him. The weasel professor has since his vanishing in BFD and L&R never been heard of again, but he likely ended up stranded on another planet.
Don weaso is the head and boss of an weasel mafia group, consisting merely of Weaso himself, his henchmen Paulie, Frankie, Chicho, and Ali (or Allie as he sometimes are called). He was the owner of an Dance club named Rock Solid. He were the one who ordered one of the rock mens to go and kidnap Berri for use as a exotic dancer. He's known to be much of an dealmaker, and does whatever it takes to earn money. In situations other than CBFD, he's the owner of the Feral Reserve Bank, and orders his guards to protect the bank's valuables while he's away somewhere... which is often easier said than done, as the guards tend to get tired of their job and instead pass their time, even allowing thieves in despite Don Weaso having told them not to. Aside from this, Don Weaso enjoys money, hot baths, vacations, smoking cigars, and wearing the best outfits ever available.
The Fabled Panther King
The king, and the evil ruler of the Fairy Panther Kingdom. He's a king who rarely ever leaves his throne, and also has an constant demand for milk. He's threatening to many, including his own throne guards. Apparantly nobody likes him(even his guards fear him). Professor VonKripelspac, his mere servant and simple problem fixer, planned on dethroning the king and get his revenge. The Panther King is killed at the end of Bad Fur Day due to the alien inside him being born. After he were tucked out of the airlock he hasn't been heard of since.
The Throne Guards
An pair of dumb weasels who guards the throne of the Panther King. They don't seem to take their new king too well, and just wishes that he soon would vanish from their castle. In their pastimes, they usually don't have much to do apart from falling asleep whilst guarding.
The Weasel Mafia
The four members of Don Weaso's mob league, consisting of Paulie, Frankie, Chicho, and Ali. One of them, Paulie, were beaten up by Don Weaso for not showing any respect. They later reappear in the Mulitplayer variant of heist, in which they try robbing a bank. As would be expected, they start pitting themselves against each other, as each team wants to please the boss. If this or that team would win the game, Don Weaso will get pleased by all the money he's got, while the others may be thrown into the water to let them die by drowning.
Seen in the Vertex level. They were guarding the bank that Conker and berri came to rob. What happened to them afterwards remains unknown.
The Weasels Band
The Weasels Band: Seen in the Cock and Plucker pub in the beginning of the game. Don Weaso also seems to like hanging out at the band from time to time as well. Nothing else is known about the two other weasels though.
The cave woman who Conker met during his Bad Fur Day. When he first saw her far away he thought about paying her a visit(mainly her big chest, with a cash reward in mind as well). Upon arriving where she was waiting, he couldn't see her at first, but by looking up he saw the very cave woman in front of him, almost as tall as a building. He didn't believe his eyes and fainted for a moment. After their meeting he was on his own again, and sets out to find the wad of cash who now was hopping around outside. What happened to Jugga afterwards remains unknown, but she supposedly left the arena.
Buga the Knut
An enormous caveman who sits on his throne in the Raptor arena. He sees himself as a kind of ceasar figure, and believes that he's the only one who has the BIGGEST bone. Upon seeing Conker having killed all the nearly defenseless Ugas he becomes infuriated by this, as the ugas and Conker was supposed to be fed to fangy, and not the other way around. He swears to have his revenge by entering the arena himself and showing the squirrel his "big bone". His plan was immediatedly backfired however when Jugga saw how small his penis really is. Feeling humiliated, he runs out of the arena through the wall. What occurred to him later on no one knows for sure.
Ron & Reg
Ron and Reg are a talking Paint Pot and Paint brush (respectively). They seem to do nothing else but making their "Friend" Franky the Pitchfork "kick the ass" of anyone entering the barn all day. Reg however seems to have an annoying habit of repeating whatever Ron is saying right after Franky hanged himself. They both reappear later in the throne room, with Reg still repeating Ron much to his dismay. Since CBFD they seem to have broke their friendship due to an specific little issue that happened between them. While Ron just sits in the barn all day enjoying himself, Reg now is out in the open hopping around miserable, pathetic, and frequently drinking. He at one point also knocked down by ConkerGuru during an interview of his by throwing an anvil at him. Ron on the other hand has seemingly forgotten about ever having been friends with Reg, and so no longer remembers him. They both aren't liked by many, including their "supposed" friend Franky.
These little fellas were created (and resurrected) by Kriplespac. They look like giant teddy bears, but evil and only has one thing in mind; destroying and killing anyone they sees entering their base. The Tediz were later destroyed by Conker, and has since CBFD never been heard of again.
Also known as The Little Girl in the original game, this puppet girl is the one who controls the Robo Tedi corpse when battling Conker(though many tend to call her Reagan instead of her original name). Despite being her own being, she can't move on her own, and depends on the Tedi robot himself. She also says "I haven't been a little girl for some time now", indicating that she was once a real living being, who was being made a robotic puppet by Kriplespac and attached to his experiment, thus explaining why she still is in her child body. This gives her a bit of an alter ego, with one side being nice, and the other being evil and rather foulmouthed. In her most recent "unofficial" appearance the Tediz seems to have fixed her up, now being an adult, and also no longer being as intelligent as she used to be due to them not giving her any brain.
The Squirrel Colonel is an minor character in CBFD, who also seems to be heavily mistaken about things he hears about, like not knowing where the Tediz came from and calling them "an unknown enemy". He greets Conker for surviving an nearby warplane crash, despite him not having being in close proximity to the crash. He also says "Ah. Fuck that shit!" whenever he messes up speaking, one of these instances being when he sings "I don't know what I've been told..." to the tune of Military marching songs, further proving he has below-average intelligence.
Fangy the Raptor
Fangy is a dinosaur of undisclosed species. He appears only in the uga Buga arena where his primal savage tendencies are being showcased as entertainment for the cavemen. He attacks anything that moves when released. He oddly already is fitted with reins, which Conker makes use of by hypnotizing the Raptor, using him as a steed and then riding around the arena attacking the cavemen and the rather large obese Buga the knut. Being hostile towards Conker at first, he eventually grows attached to him. When Conker tries to leave, the raptor follows him like a loyal dog, but Conker manages to make him go back in to his holding pen from whence he came.
Ugas are a tribe of cavemen who lives a lifestyle similar to that of Ancient Romans. They worship a god who doesn't even exist, and don't like the rock mens who live alongside them. Don Weaso, the head of his mafia lead, wants to get rid of them, and orders Conker to clear the cave free of them by dropping a bomb in the lava beneath the egg where Conker hatched the little baby dino.
Wayne and the Wankas
Wayne is the leader of a criminal of wasps known as the Wankas who lives at the top of a hill in Windy. They often steal the hive of Mrs. Bee, only to have it taken back by Conker.
This guy is seen in the opening cut scene, Barn Boys, and Uga Buga only. The Monk is being puked on by Conker when he leaves the pub, and hisses at him. He always stands still reading an engraving on a stone. While they tend to hiss at anything, they're harmless. He gets killed by a baby dino when it jumps out of it's egg, and landing on him.
Gregg the Grim Reaper
Gregg is a colourful character, who appears when Conker dies the 1st. time. He explains the "life system" to him, and drops him back into the living world. Gregg later appears at the beginning of Spooky, and aids Conker by giving him a shotgun. (though not without saying "it's better than that pissing frying pan, that's for sure") He is a "diminutive" reaper, and has a coarse mouth, which makes him a fan favorite. He apparantly hates cats, as they have nine lives and each take him forever to catch and claim. He also hates zombies, as they already are dead and sees no point as to reaping them. He also brought Berri back to life at the urging of Conker.
Birdy the Scarecrow
Birdy is a scarecrow who helps Conker with using the Context B-zone buttons he encounters. He often drinks more than he should, and is quite foulmouthed of himself. (though in Bad Fur Day, he didn't seem to show any signs of being foulmouthed) He's only seen in Hungover, the first part of Windy, and at the beginning of the game when Conker enters the pub.
An sunflower who King Bee wants to pollinate. When Conker meets her she tells him to go away, knowing that the tail of his looks very tickly. She usually covers her chest. After Conker brings five swarms of tickling bees she reveals her... well, what else should I say? chest probably... Upon seeing this King Bee proceeds to "pollinate" her, and Conker gets his cash reward.
These flaming little creatures are very drunk, and smokes and drinks lighter fluid all day. They laugh manically while chasing Conker. They are immune to psysical beatings, and can only be defeated by Conker peeing on them.
The Great Mighty Poo
This pile of fecal matter appears in the cave inside the Poo Mountain. He swear-sings at Conker whenever he has toilet paper tossed into his mouth. Conker defeats him by flushing him down. TGMPoo doesn't seem to take the beetles too kindly, and by surprise drowns them in his lake of poo.
Kid Conker (Created by C.Guru)
One of Conker's siblings. He is Conker's little brother. Having originally appeared in a fan art pic as the type of Conker from Twelve Tales, he has been heavily changed into a somewhat lowminded, dimwitted, and also a person who is afraid of heights (though his design has remained largely unchanged). He usually sees his life as hard, especially since he's practicing the common jumping technique of the squirrels; jumping from one tree to another. Though every attempt he makes always results in failure, as he stops in the middle of every jump, only to plummet down to ground. He's apparantly not the brightest guy around, but he may at times show himself to be cunning and smart in certain situations. He usually wears a blue cap with the first letter of his name printed on it, an blue shirt and a yellow cape, and yellow shoes with a blue colour on the tip of them. He's mostly called Kiddy instead of Kid Conker, due to his dimwitted and often childish nature.
Ysha (Created by C.Guru)
Another of Conker's siblings. She's Conker's little sister. She is slightly taller than both Conker and Kid Conker, and has no squirrel tail. She lives in Nutty Woods, which is also where Kid Conker is living. Both Kid Conker and Ysha don't get along well at times, but she does care for him, like when he goes astray. Conker often questions Ysha where she got her name, but she says she cannot even remember. Being the sister of her siblings, she if often smart and playfull, and likes pshysical activities like bungee-jumping, jumping from tree to tree, and sky diving. She has an likeness for japanese culture, and is very skilled in karate.
Fegisen (Created by C.Guru)
Should actually be named The Coward in english, but this fella has said he doesn't like this, so his name remains untranslated, but the swedish word Fegisen is not easily pronounceable in english, so I may have to figure out some way for doing so. Anyways, Fegisen is an descedant of the Bank Weasel guards who was lucky to survive the horror of being shot down during the robbing conducted by Don Weaso with the help of Conker and Berri. He once served in guarding the Feral Reverse bank.(formely called Feral Reserve Bank back in the times of CBFD.)
He was pretty much a coward in his early days, and rarely ever stepped into battle, mainly due to an incident that happened while he still was in the army. One day, an Matrix esque trio (Namely Conker and Berri in their Neo attire) came in the bank and started shooting down every guard in sight in pretty much every Cool-ish way, and Fegisen sure was one of them to be shot down to death unless if he acted fast. Rather than firing back, he covered himself in fear, hoping it all would end soon. Even if Neo Conker sure shot down every guard, he still felt he missed one, and looked around at every corner, including the pillars, at which Fegisen tried to hide behind in order to not be noticed. Luckily he didn't find him, as Fegisen moved away to another pillar when Conker was about to approach, while his girlfriend Berri had an easy time of noticing him in the background, but never bothered to tell Conker, as the guard looked harmless. Soon they leave the main floor of the bank, and goes up to the 2nd floor via a elevator. Feeling relief to have saved himself from getting killed, he feels he's had enough of guarding an boring little bank and decides to follow the duo from behind. Later he appears again during a battle between Conker, who is now controlling an yellow cyberspace suit, and a alien named Heinrich. Just before everything is to end for Conker, Fegisen finds an plug in the wall and decides to unplug it out just to see what happens. By doing this however, the game freezes up the moment the alien was about to attack Conker, which makes Conker believe that the game locked up due to the game testers not spending enough time to debug it, while by logical fact it was Fegisen that made it happen. After Conker's crowned king of the Fairy Panther Kingdom, Fegisen still tries to explain that it was he who made it happen, but nobody notices him(or mostly ignores him perhaps, due to him not having been involved with anything much), so he's left behind with no attention, and goes out of the castle via some rusty metal stairs that no one knew existed.
Ever since all this had happened, he's grown a bit more manly, but is still unable to go into battle, and acts like a female whenever a single bullet fired from a gun passes by and hides behind something. Due to his cowardly nature and personality, maybe that's the reason why his friends called him Fegisen(even Don Weaso started calling him that). He still tends to come back to the Feral Reverse Bank though, as it was almost like home to him early on. He can be described as... well, a coward, due to him being too afraid to do anything useful, especially if it is war-time. He also seems to have bad luck at times, as a bunch of black cats may soon start following him. He is a close friend to Conker, but whenever Conker or someone else is angry about something, he tends to think that either he or she is mad at him despite this not being the case. He also bears alot of phobias, including being afraid of dating girls, even if only coming near one will make him just stand still in fear, trying to find a way out of it. Fear of flying, and aquaphobia(fear of being under deep waters).
Weasley (Created by C.Guru)
Looks identical to Fegisen, only having a slight lighter tint of gray to his uniform. He also once served in guarding the bank, but also is pretty much of an party guy of himself, often going to the pub with his other pals(Fegisen included), just to get themselves heavily drunk. This, coupled with their serious disability of guarding the bank, is something Don Weaso really didn't like.
Christine the Zombie Squirrel (Created by C.Guru)
Though not having yet been a fully established character, she is the remains of a young woman from back in the days of Count Batula. Her history remains a bit dull, but by reading the diary of Batula himself reveals that he had a dislike of Christine because of her success in being a tenor, in which he viewed as awful to his own ears, and planned to kill her in order to take it for himself. When the day finally came he invited her over to his mansion, with the intent on drinking her blood and bury her lifeless body under the ground. Not long though the door in the main hall bangs loudly. The villagers have come to hunt Count batula down and tell him about all the bills he refused to pay and kill him unless he pays them, much to his horror. Fearing that they would find Christine in his household, he instead decided to hide her body underground in a empty grave without any writing on it just outside his backyard. He had already made her fall asleep long before that by secretedly dropping sleeping drugs in her wine. After burying her body alive, he rushed over to the door of the hall and opened it. He welcomed them in the way he always does whenever he gets visitors, and apologized for not payings his bills. He promised to do what they told him, as well as being nicer towards the villagers in the future. After they left, he came to the realization that he still had to kill Christine, but now couldn't because he had already buried her body under his backyard, and couldn't bother digging it up again, so he just ignored her and went to his bedroom for further writing on his diary, and after about 100 years he had all forgotten about it.
Christine is at present still alive and young, but half-squirrel/zombie due to her body not having rottened enough despite having been buried alive for over 100 years. She always wears dark sunglasses regardless if it's night or daytime due to her eyesight being sensitive to lightsources(common thing about ghouls and zombies really), and to not reveal her true face for anyone else. Much like normal zombies she tends to get thirsty for blood, but always refuses to obey her instincts. She still tries to take on a career as a tenor, but miserably fails due to her voice not being the way it used to be. She is a friend to Conker and pals, and only they know that Christine herself is a zombie. She's also a bit of a party girl, and likes to crank it up with rather hectic music, much to the dismay of Conker and pals.
Little Shitjohn (Created by C.Guru)
While a character related to the Conker universe, he still is a completely different character created for a completely different series, namely Den Avskyvärda Skitkyrkan (The Awful Shitchurch in english), in which The Great Mighty Poo runs his own religion, with the word Poo as their central image(and a Pooball with a gloria depicted by them as their own kind of god). Little Shitjohn got his name simply because it sounded stupid(yet somehow fitting), and that he always is hungry even if he already ate something 1 minute ago. He is a pile of fecal matter just like TGMPoo himself, only a bit smaller and skinnier. He wears big goggles with twirls on them, and always has something horrible in mind. One of these mischiefs being when TGMPoo decided to run an amusement park for Wood-Stocks(just to earn some quick bucks), he sneaked away while TGMPoo chatted with his other pals, finding an room with lots of buttons and levers. Wondering what they would do if he touched them, he began pressing everything, making the carousel outside in the middle of the park spin REAL fast and start spinning around wrecking everything in it's path, including the amusement park which they worked so hard on setting up. Another being whenever they are about to sing TGMPoo's signature Sloprano, he always wants to take it for himself, even if his voice sounds rather awful to the others.